When I found out that I had an incurable disease, I worried about revealing it to others because I did not want to be seen as fragile, sick, or dying. Now that I have shared my news, I guess I thought things would be different. Things are not. My friends still have every bit of confidence that I can run another marathon with them, I am still treated as if I am stronger than I am, and I am still the one everyone seeks advice from when they are going through something difficult. I continue to lead my small group at church because I want it to continue and someone needs to do the work. My small group is a safe place where I can just be broken and accepted but even at this place, I am not seen as broken and incurable. This is what I wanted. I did not want to be treated differently but I sometimes think that my will to be strong has resulted in an isolated journey. Sometimes, I am ok with that. Other times, I am not. Mother doesn’t understand. Husband is asleep. Wine helps.